Reflection - Baby Steps in High Heels

Tuesday, December 28, 2010


The past year has been a year of many firsts for me. Although I became a new mother toward the end of 2009, it probably wasn’t until well into 2010 that I began to make my way out of the post-crappy-pregnancy, post-crappy-c-section, post-what-the-heck-do-I-do-now haze that was the month of December last year.

Amongst the firsts that I’ve experienced …

-I survived the crushing guilt and sadness of the ‘now I must go back to work and leave my child in the care of others’ when my maternity leave came to an end. Truth be told, this is one I continue to ‘survive’ on a pretty regular basis.

-I made peace with the fact that my body simply would not produce enough milk to nurse my child. And, in the end, I even made peace with how disgusting I thought formula was. I remember thinking that it stunk to high heaven … now I barely notice.

-When the time came, I taught Baby how to eat from a spoon! It was pretty awesome to be the one to teach her how to do something that she had never before experienced. To watch just a little bit of progress every time was really cool. Now I barely think about what a feat it was.

-That smile of hers. And those baby noises ... “Ah-gurrr” and “Geee” are still some of the most amazing sounds I have ever heard in my entire life! That, and the belly laughs. The best sounds ever!

-Diaper Blow Outs! Man, who knew this would be the easy part of parenting? Even the ones that happened while on the road!

-Spitting up. I survived. We all survived. Nine LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG months. Maybe even closer to ten months. I remember thinking that there would never be a time that we went anywhere without a burp cloth, that nobody would ever see Baby’s adorable outfits because they were always hiding behind bibs … but we made it!

-Milestones. Rolling over. Sitting up. Pulling up. Cruising along. Realizing that every time I thought she was “just about to do it” … she had other plans for me and made me wait. I’m pretty sure this was how she taught me that she was really the one in charge!

-And speaking of milestones, there were some pretty amazing ones on the emotional end of things, too. Even if I cried or was an emotional wreck … I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything in the world! The first birthday. The first time she called me ‘mama’ (which was actually just the other day because she calls both Husband and me Dada most of the time). The first time we hung out, just the two of us, and did nothing but giggle at who knows what. The first time we looked at each other and just knew … we were meant for each other.

-Watching Baby learn new things throughout the first year of her life. It started with simple things like rolling over, eating from a spoon, etc. Now it’s putting concepts together. Learning to communicate with words or sign language. Pointing to what she wants. Her curiosity is amazing.

-Black Friday shopping. Okay, this one seems a little funny, but it’s true. My mom commented that I had changed quite a bit when I listed off all the stores I wanted to go into on BF: Gymboree, The Children’s Place, Target (for any number of baby items), etc. It wasn’t too long ago that there would have been a very different variety of stores on my list. And, I suppose that this can be applied to many other areas of life. My priorities have most definitely changed in the last year.

There are many, many more (obviously!), but these are the ones that come to mind right now. I know that 2011 will bring just as many new experiences, some good, some probably not so good (I envision trips to the ER with toddler-hood looming) … some disgusting (given that we’re still dealing with diapers). All of which, though, will make up the story of our lives.

Of course, I’d be okay of that story didn’t include any more explosive diapers.

I'd also be okay without another ear infection, doctor's visit (with the exception of well checks), or anymore peas in my hair. Just sayin' ...


  1. Great post!
    The line that said, "The first time we looked at each other and just knew … we were meant for each other..." Ooh. That made me get teary-eyed.

  2. What a year! Definitely different when you have a baby.

  3. What a great post!!! Happy holidays!!

  4. Great post. A lot happens in a year. Especially your first year of motherhood. I had to chuckle at the Black Friday comment. Motherhood changes everything, doesn't it?!

  5. How fun to look at the past year! I may do one of those posts later this week! :)

    Babies sure do change things! And teach us so many new that they are in charge! :)

    BTW how did your second batch of truffles turn out?